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divinecodedI'm going to preface this by acknowledging that nothing I'm saying here is new. I'm sure everything I'm going to say has been said elsewhere, possibly and probably by people who are smarter and more eloquent than I am. But I'm going to say it anyway, because maybe more people need to be saying it. Maybe if we keep repeating it, it'll make a dent in the amount of people who, for some reason, subscribe to the belief that you must list all of your personal information on your socials for any stranger to see in order to be considered trustworthy or Valid™.
No one on the internet needs to know your personal information. No one needs to know your real name, your location (vague or otherwise), your race, gender, sexuality, diagnoses, age, blood type, etc.
Now I understand how this post coming immediately after my intro post can appear hypocritical, given how much info I provided about myself. But if you pay attention to the info I gave, I intentionally kept things vague while also being informative.
For example, I said I'm disabled and chronically ill. I didn't tell you my diagnoses. I said I'm mentally ill, and the only thing I specified is that I have things that aren't just depression and anxiety, so you may infer that I have something 'more serious' (not that those illnesses aren't serious!), but have no idea what they are.
I am also an adult. I gave my age, something I did not have to do, because I wanted to and I have the understanding that there are consequences to giving out my age. In my case, I shared it so that other people here who might find my blog will know if we are around the same age and therefore more likely to get along. I also shared it so if there are minors here who are not comfortable following a blog run by an adult, they can avoid me.
But when it comes to such minors, there is no reason for them to share their age. I might even go so far as to say they shouldn't even declare publicly that they're a minor at all, because it might attract the attention of predators. Hypothetical minor could say something like "I'm a minor, don't follow me if you're older than 18". What is to stop a predator from lying?
This inherent trust that kids place in strangers online is more than concerning. It opens them up to all kinds of dangers; abuse, scams, identity theft if the predator in question can get enough info out of them if they become 'friends'. It's fucked up, honestly. There's a reason all those ads for kids' sites say 'get your parents' permission first', and it's so the parents can monitor the information kids make public, as well as the people who interact with their kids.
Then there's Tumblr. Maybe Twitter as well, but I don't really use Twitter so that's an assumption. Kids on Tumblr share everything. When I listed all those things you don't need to share, I wasn't making up some hyperbolic, hypothetical person in my brain. I have seen all of these things listed in the bio, about, or Carrds of Tumblr kids. And adults.
Both groups are opening themselves up to abuse by doing this. Why would you list all of these things? Why would you assume strangers have your best interest at heart when society, especially in the last two years, has proven that people can and will do things specifically to harm you if you meet a criteria they don't like?
I understand that listing your minority status can help you find others like you for community and solidarity. It's why I list all of my Queer Designators. But it's also a beacon to those looking to hurt you for being not white, not cishet, not Christian, etc. I know this one is more difficult because it also assures others you're allowed to use certain words or memes that people not in your group can use, so it's a trade off, I guess, whether you feel safe making this information public. I can say I've never been harassed online for being queer, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
Not to be all 'back in my day,' but the internet used to be seen as like, the Wild West or some shit. You were never supposed to give your real name to anyone, whether you were an adult or a child. You were never supposed to give too many personal details that might make it easier for someone to identify or track you down. Now, you're expected to not only make all of this info public, but view those who keep their info private as suspicious or creepy.
Why? Why is being a private person frowned upon now? Why does anyone signing up to use Facebook (don't use Facebook, please) have to sign up using their legal name? Why do you have to add your phone number to anything? If I had been asked for a phone number on the internet in 2004 that would have been a red flag. I would have backed out of that site so fucking fast my shitty computer would have frozen. But now it's just expected. And in some cases, if you don't have a phone, well too bad, guess you can't have an account on this site. Sucks for you.
I know I'm just old man yells at cloud at this point, but I needed to vent about this. It's depressing and scary how little privacy we're entitled to now. But fuck that. I'm going to continue being a vague, anonymous figure on the internet. And I hope more people do the same.
No one on the internet needs to know your personal information. No one needs to know your real name, your location (vague or otherwise), your race, gender, sexuality, diagnoses, age, blood type, etc.
Now I understand how this post coming immediately after my intro post can appear hypocritical, given how much info I provided about myself. But if you pay attention to the info I gave, I intentionally kept things vague while also being informative.
For example, I said I'm disabled and chronically ill. I didn't tell you my diagnoses. I said I'm mentally ill, and the only thing I specified is that I have things that aren't just depression and anxiety, so you may infer that I have something 'more serious' (not that those illnesses aren't serious!), but have no idea what they are.
I am also an adult. I gave my age, something I did not have to do, because I wanted to and I have the understanding that there are consequences to giving out my age. In my case, I shared it so that other people here who might find my blog will know if we are around the same age and therefore more likely to get along. I also shared it so if there are minors here who are not comfortable following a blog run by an adult, they can avoid me.
But when it comes to such minors, there is no reason for them to share their age. I might even go so far as to say they shouldn't even declare publicly that they're a minor at all, because it might attract the attention of predators. Hypothetical minor could say something like "I'm a minor, don't follow me if you're older than 18". What is to stop a predator from lying?
This inherent trust that kids place in strangers online is more than concerning. It opens them up to all kinds of dangers; abuse, scams, identity theft if the predator in question can get enough info out of them if they become 'friends'. It's fucked up, honestly. There's a reason all those ads for kids' sites say 'get your parents' permission first', and it's so the parents can monitor the information kids make public, as well as the people who interact with their kids.
Then there's Tumblr. Maybe Twitter as well, but I don't really use Twitter so that's an assumption. Kids on Tumblr share everything. When I listed all those things you don't need to share, I wasn't making up some hyperbolic, hypothetical person in my brain. I have seen all of these things listed in the bio, about, or Carrds of Tumblr kids. And adults.
Both groups are opening themselves up to abuse by doing this. Why would you list all of these things? Why would you assume strangers have your best interest at heart when society, especially in the last two years, has proven that people can and will do things specifically to harm you if you meet a criteria they don't like?
I understand that listing your minority status can help you find others like you for community and solidarity. It's why I list all of my Queer Designators. But it's also a beacon to those looking to hurt you for being not white, not cishet, not Christian, etc. I know this one is more difficult because it also assures others you're allowed to use certain words or memes that people not in your group can use, so it's a trade off, I guess, whether you feel safe making this information public. I can say I've never been harassed online for being queer, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
Not to be all 'back in my day,' but the internet used to be seen as like, the Wild West or some shit. You were never supposed to give your real name to anyone, whether you were an adult or a child. You were never supposed to give too many personal details that might make it easier for someone to identify or track you down. Now, you're expected to not only make all of this info public, but view those who keep their info private as suspicious or creepy.
Why? Why is being a private person frowned upon now? Why does anyone signing up to use Facebook (don't use Facebook, please) have to sign up using their legal name? Why do you have to add your phone number to anything? If I had been asked for a phone number on the internet in 2004 that would have been a red flag. I would have backed out of that site so fucking fast my shitty computer would have frozen. But now it's just expected. And in some cases, if you don't have a phone, well too bad, guess you can't have an account on this site. Sucks for you.
I know I'm just old man yells at cloud at this point, but I needed to vent about this. It's depressing and scary how little privacy we're entitled to now. But fuck that. I'm going to continue being a vague, anonymous figure on the internet. And I hope more people do the same.
